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Time to cut loose

“You have to do something for me.”

“Cut me loose.”

“One cam can’t hold us all.”

“You have to cut me loose…

or else I’ll pull everybody down.”

“Everybody will die!”

“Shut up, Annie!”

“It’s one dead or three, Peter.”

“Don’t make him do this.”

“You’re gonna kill your sister.”

“Annie will die if you don’t.”

“-I won’t do it! -Cut the rope!”

“-I can’t! -Stop it!”

“That cam is gonna come out and Annie and you will die!”

“-You’ll kill your sister! -Stop it!”

“Cut the damn rope!”

“It doesn’t matter about me. Cut it.”

“We’re out of time!”

“Don’t do it!”

“No one will blame you for it! Just cut it!”

“Annie and you are gonna die! Just cut it, Peter!”

The scene ends with Peter taking the heartbreaking decision to cut the cord.*

The decision to cut his father loose was a tough one, but it was the only logical choice, there was no way to save them all. So, he (and of course their father) sacrificed for the sake of their survival.

I doubt most of us will end up in a situation like Peter, where we need to make an on-the-spot decision based on mortal danger.

However, there are various situations in our lives, which will deliver us in a position where we must decide if we should cut someone or something loose. These may include but are not limited to relationships, work, habits, goals & dreams.


Cutting others loose

The decision to cut loose, most commonly, happens in our relationship with others, be it with a friend, a partner or even a family member.

It is because they have the most active influence on you.

Their way of thinking, feeling, reasoning, and acting has a direct impact on your person and how you perceive and experience the world around you.

You do not always have to look in the mirror if you feel unhappy or sad.

There might be people in your life, calling themselves friends, who treat you poorly, take advantage of you, or bring you down. As they are a danger to your mental health and personal happiness, it would be wise to assess the people around you.

How do you feel when he is around you?

How does she treat me?

Do I constantly need to prove myself to him?

Does he make jokes at the expense of me?

What am I to her?

Your time on this earth is limited, so you should make the most of it.

This also applies to who you let into your social circle.

The people closest to you should be the ones you can lean on in times of need; they should be lifting you up (and vice-versa); they should add value and meaning to your life.

When people are just a source of stress, anger, worries or unhappiness; it should not be difficult to –Snip- cut the cord!


Even the ones close to me?

It’s not because the same blood is running through your veins, you under the obligation to endure the damaging habits or thinking of a family member. You did not sign a contract of permanent bonding on the day of your birth.

Equally, It’s not because you once loved each other, shared your lives together for some time, and even brought a new life into this world you are indebted to that person, forever.

No hidden clause in life gives anybody rights on anybody’s time, space or belongings.

Once the other person no longer offers you what to expect of a relationship (like support, love, care, responsibility, honesty, friendship) and it is clear that this attitude will not change, it is only right to cut the cord.


Cut loose from a deadly job

Does your job make you sad, you feel unfulfilled?

Perhaps the workplace is tainted with toxic thinking and gossiping?

Not only your colleagues, but even the boss seems to be poisoned by it?

Well, you can’t actually take distance from your colleagues, even less so from your boss.

You feel like you are meant for better things? You feel like your full potential is not being reached? But you are sticking around your job, possibly because you feel ashamed, arrogant or ungrateful for thinking like this?

Or maybe your type of work forces you to use your skills in tasks that are not enjoyable for you. It’s not because you are good at something, you have to like it! You feel drained and miserable every day you come home from work.

Hmm… It sounds like you are dying slowly.

The difference here, it can be you are actually dangling on the rock that is your job and cutting the cord might not be the wisest choice right now.

So, let’s look for a different anchoring point before cutting loose that one, right?


When cutting loose means sacrifice

Looking from the other perspective, you might be the person in the position of Peter andAnnie’s Father.

Again, I will not be talking about the physical sacrifice to save someoneelse.

However, compared with physical sacrifice, the emotional sacrifice might be even more hurtful and long-term.

Perhaps you are a parent, and you feel very reluctant of letting go one of your children. You don’t want to see them go to college, getting married, or move out of the house or, worse, the country.

But in truth, if you would deny them of that, you are the weight pulling your kids down, refusing them to rise to their immense potential.

And while some children, kind and loyal (or they did not read my blog yet), will allow their parents to drag them down, others will take matters into their own hands, and cut the cord themselves.

The kids that stuck around might eventually end up resenting their parents, while the parents of the children that cut the cord might feel displeased. In the end, both relationships will have suffered some damage.

Therefore, it would be wiser for parents to cut the cord and allow your kids to find their way. If lost, believe me, they will come back to you.

There are other situations where you should decide yourself to cut the cord for the sake of others.

Be it being in a relationship, or wishing you were in a relationship with someone. Sometimes you have to acknowledge you are not able to provide the happiness that one person deserves. Sometimes someone else is in a much better position or has the right personality to make the person you love much happier.

If so, it could be you are the one that should let go.

Why? Just like in the relationship with parents and kids, some people are loyal to a fault. They would never consider cutting the cord, even if they realized it would be for the better.

It is not always because someone would be happier with another partner, sometimes they could be even more content alone. Perhaps they have dreams or hopes which you are not able to help fulfill.

In the long run, cutting loose will save you both from a lot of heartache and sorrow, future resentment and most likely the inevitable breakup.


The Cut

However, cutting the cord is not just a run-of-the-mill action.

In the movie scene, Peter was looking his father in the eyes when cutting the cord.

It was not an ordinary act. It was very personal and emotional. It was goodbye.

When personal, with a friend, a family member or partner, the matter should be handled respectively. You will have to communicate, reason, explain why this decision is for the best (for you, himher, or both)

Most likely this will not be as mutually accepted by both parties as with Peter and his father, so be prepared for an emotionally loaded conversation.

When you are considering of cutting ties with your company, this will most likely be less emotional, at least if handled professionally.

It is essential to understand that you might not be cutting the work from you, but you are cutting yourself from the job.

If so, preparation is in order, so make sure you have another job or a solution which can support you, or you might be in for a pretty long fall.

Cutting loose does not only concern personal and professional relationships. You might also have to let loose some unreachable dreams and goals, quit some unhealthy or harmful habits, change your lifestyle or lose once strong believed opinions.

No matter what ties you are cutting, it will demand a lot of effort and determination.

It is a courageous thing to do, and even more heroic if you are doing it to improve the happiness and life quality of others.

*The transcript was taken from the movieVertical Limit

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